Dating and Twiggy

I just realized something. I find it weird to blog about how my dates went (details, the guy, etc etc)–I guess I have to draw the line somewhere. Hehe I suppose it’s something I would rather keep to myself and my immediate friends.

But, the gist of the story is…the one tonight went well. I am no longer in an I-hate-men mood. The guy redeemed mankind so members of the opposite sex are again welcome in my world. hahaha. *rolls eyes*

Anyway, I’m going on a 60s themed party this Friday and I’m channeling Twiggy. I love it. I already have a dress. Mustard Yellow. I bought it today at People are People and it is love. As in the moment I saw it hidden between the other dresses on the rack, I knew it was my destiny to have that dress. Hahahaha

I’m still trying to convince Cel to do my makeup. I mean, I’m just being a good friend here. I wouldn’t want her makeup lessons to go to waste…*ahem*

I’m getting a haircut again tomorrow. Josh has been bugging me to cut the back part shorter to make it more stylish so I’m giving in. And it’ll complete my Twiggy look so…all for the sake of fashion! LOL

Agitated

I’ve been really agitated the past two days. Swear, it has been one major headache. I can’t wait til Saturday. I need ME time.

I’m in dire need of a rejuvenating (and sedating) full body massage. haaaaaay.

I have a date later and it’s with my friend J’s friend A. Haha I hope he redeems every single guy on the planet later. Because I am in an I-hate-men mood. Good luck! hahaha

Sigh. Deep breaths.

It is always uncomfortable to grow

Many of the things that are required to build and maintain healthy self – esteem can be uncomfortable, but the truth is they are essential. The good news is, with practice, uneasiness subsides and they become part of who you are.

Saying “NO”, and asserting yourself, asking for what you want, expressing your true feelings, saying positive things about yourself, letting someone love and nurture you… these may all be things that are uncomfortable. But only at first.

One sure way to conquer discomfort is to simply do what is uncomfortable. Step away from complacency and dare to grow and develop yourself today. Start by choosing something that you have been putting off. Then, just do it!

>>My friend Cris sent this to me. Haha funny, twas just what I needed.

Level up

Leah and I ran into Level Up guy today. *faints*

Yun lang. Hahaha

Hotness!

Catch of the day

I finally have a title for my book–Catch of the Day! It speaks of women AND food. Hahaha perfect. Now I just have to get down to actually WRITING it. I already have the outline of the plot, still have to think of the characters’ names which is a breeze, and I even have the settings in mind already. It’s just the writing part I’m having trouble starting.

But I will this weekend. I intend to finish 3 chapters by Monday. I can do this. Hehe

It’s funny how everything I’m doing right now is so connected. I’m writing this book, which talks a lot about dating (it’s sort of Like Water for Chocolate-ish), and while I’m doing this, I’ve also been dating around quite a lot. Haha. So I have “research” material. Eyelove.

I’m having fun doing my “research.” Wahaha. It has been interesting. >_<

You know that phrase “So many men, so little time?” Kinda feeling that right now. Hahaha aliw.

Another day :)

Yesterday was quite overwhelming. I got invited to coach again. This time by Adelle whom I just look up to so much–she’s like one of the best coaches in OCCI. And although I haven’t really confirmed with her yet, I already know (same way I knew when Jovy invited me) that I will do it. Waaah. Back to back. My schedule’s fully booked until October then. Waha. I swear I am taking a trip to Bora or wherever when all this is over.

I cannot believe it but time really does fly when you take the leap. I’ve been coaching for almost a month now–prepared for it for more than two months–and already I’ve seen amazing changes in my students. It’s a different feeling–making a difference in people’s lives. Yes I know it sounds incredibly cheesy, especially coming from me. I am so not the person I was a year ago. I’ve changed so much. It’s daunting. But I love it.

And as if the changes I am experiencing now aren’t enough, bigger and more amazing changes are coming. I can feel it.

Now if I could only just get down and start writing that book…waaah my professional goal isn’t moving as fast as I’d like. I really have to take the time out to actually WRITE it already. This week before the 2nd intensive, I’m finishing the first chapter.

Today I must have a title already. Waaaaaah! I already have a plot, a storyline. It’s the title I’m having difficulty with. “7 days” must be part of the title. It has to be catchy. And not too long. Gaaaad I can do this.

Back to work now!

I am an artist

The instant I saw my painting finally complete and framed–I felt euphoric. Is it normal to be in love with one’s own work? haha

I have always loved art. The one time I went to New York, I squeezed in a lot of museum visits even though it ended up driving my relatives crazy. When I was in San Francisco, I’d go to SF MOMA every first Tuesday of the month to take advantage of the free entrance (haha) and I’d spend the better part of the day basking in the presence of my favorite artists’ masterpieces. There was just something magical about looking at an artwork a century older than you. You know the artist has long since gone but his presence is still very much alive–a part of him is immortalized in his artwork. The first time I saw a Picasso and a Van Gogh, I got goosebumps. I felt they were in the room watching me.

I’ve always wanted to be an artist ever since I was a kid. And although I have pursued it as a hobby all these years, I didn’t consider myself an artist. I was just a kid who liked to paint.

Last night, though…the moment I saw my work framed…in all its glory…it suddenly hit me. Putang ina artist ako!!!! Wahaha

It’s just really different when you elevate art to the level of total self-expression. This was the first original artwork I ever did. I’ve been painting all my life but most of my subjects, I copied from photos from magazines or from photos I took. They were paintings, yes; but they were not works of art. They were imitations.

This one was total essence though.

I’m not going to live forever like Van Gogh, Matisse and Picasso; but a part of me has already been immortalized in that artwork. It captured a moment of me in time–my hopes and frustrations, my fear and excitement, my passion.

It captured me.

-

“I tell you, the more I think, the more I feel that there is nothing more truly artistic than to love people.”
-Vincent Van Gogh

“Art washes away from the soul the dust of everyday life.”
-Pablo Picasso

“Drawing is like making an expressive gesture with the advantage of permanence.”
-Henri Matisse

Art attack!

The past weekend–I had a long one because I took Friday off from work–was quite interesting. In fact, it was very nerve-wrecking. Anything but boring. I was teetering on the edge of insanity.

See, I set the time aside specifically to finish my art entry to Metrobank’s Art & Design Excellence competition. Deadline is on May 9 and as I am quite the procrastinator, I didn’t start painting a month ago as originally planned. Well, I did but only in spurts. The bulk of the work I did only this weekend. A really bad idea. Well, a good one if you want to give yourself a heart attack!

Sigh. I know. I alone am the one responsible for the ticking time bomb state I was in. Hehe

Anyway, I wouldn’t be as tense if MADE did not require the artwork be photographed FRAMED. I couldn’t find a framing shop that could do the job in less than three days. Most required at least ten days and were not really open to accepting rush jobs–I was a bit irritated by the girl from this framing store in MOA. I was trying to negotiate about the time and she was being rude about it. As in I wanted to throw the sample frame at her!!!

Kidding!

So there I was, already resigned to having it photographed unframed. Then a burst of light came. Haha. Bea, my new best friend Bea (yeah BFFs forever! hahaha), called and told me she found an art store in UP that could finish the job on Wednesday–which is even earlier than the deadline I set! I got Bea to join the painting competition with me and we were both really on the verge of giving up about the framing requirements (she was more relaxed about it though hehe) when she happened to have lunch at Chocolate Kiss with her cousin and voila! Art Circle was right across the room! I remember the last time I paid that gallery a visit–I was still in college and taking CD’s oil painting elective in Ateneo! Hehe that sorta gave me the goosebumps. I felt as if I was right where I should be.

It wasn’t until then that I realized how much time, effort, energy and emotion I have invested into this competition. As in I was a bundle of nerves the entire drive to UP Diliman. The moment I stepped into that art gallery, sheer and utter relief! Home sweet home!

I now know why I haven’t touched a paint brush in the past four years.

Art brings out the best and worst in me. During painting, there were moments wherein I would really be on the verge of losing it. As in there was a time yesterday that if Bea didn’t call, I would’ve thrown away and trashed that painting out of anger!

That painting witnessed not only my moments of success and exhilaration, it brought out my dark side as well. I do not like the frustration it brings, the moments of self doubt…facing my insecurities head on…my fear of failure…it takes a lot out of me.

Every moment of art makes for an incredibly raw and vulnerable experience. A breakthrough.

But then there is always that silver lining when it comes to breakthroughs–I can always choose to be my higher self. Be bigger than my fear. Bigger than my insecurities. And that is what I love about the experience. The ride is not always fun–you encounter a lot of twists, turns, and rough patches–but the feeling you get at the end of it all is just something else.

A clean slate.

And you also acknowledge the fact that you have just reached a higher state of being. Because you went beyond the limits you have set for yourself.

Now I can’t wait until I paint my next art work! I promise never to deprive myself of the pleasure again

I’m thinking of going into mixed media this time. Explore other mediums until I find my niche!

Creative Zen Touch for Sale

Hi everyone! My friend Au’s selling her Zen Touch for PhP 4,000. Second-hand. Comes with installer CD, USB, charger and leather case. It holds up to 10,000 songs.

SPECS:

Size : WxHxD : 4.12″ x 2.7″ x 0.866″
Weight : 7.05 oz with battery

Capacity: 20GB
Battery Life : Up to 24 hours of continuous playtime
Interface : USB 2.0 (backward compatible with USB 1.1)
Playback Format: MPEG Audio Layer 3 (MP3), Windows Media™ Audio (WMA) and WAV

Display: 160 x 104 pixel resolution, blue EL backlit LCD

If you’re interested, text 0916-4978848 or e-mail rainblownfields@yahoo.com.